Apparently the Empty Bottle's housecat is ill. My guess it was due to the years of living in a unventilated smoke-filled environment- but maybe that's just me. Anyhoo, the EB is calling out for donations to help him cure what ails him.
RADLEY RELIEF FUND!
Yes, sadly, old man Radley - EB housecat, ladies man - has been struggling with his health lately, and is in need of a variety of medical procedures. We've set up a paypal 'healthcare fund' for him, should any of you be interested in contributing towards his renewed vigor. Head over to PayPal and make a donation to email@example.com.